Tuesday, March 13, 2007

First outdoor run of the year...

...SUCKS. But you don't think it's going to suck, and that's why it sucks even more. This is how it goes.

You're at work, it's nearly 60 degrees outside and it's sunny. Daylight savings time came early, so it's light later. You think to yourself, "wow, it's so warm out and it'll be light for many hours after I get home from work. It's a perfect day for a run in the park. I'm so smart." All afternoon you check the weather and it looks like perfect running weather, not a lot of wind, cool, but still warm enough. You fly out the doors like a school kid leaving for summer break, nearly dancing in the street.

You get home, pet the kitty and pull out your fancy new shorts that you got at the trendy new workout/yoga apparel store down the street (thanks to a fantastically smart Santa who got you a gift certificate). You put them on and wonder for a moment whether or not your legs are in appropriate summer shape (especially in the new shorts that are on the short side). Who cares! It's running outside time! You grab your keys and your iPod and head down the stairs.

You get to the park and realize everyone has the same idea as you, it's crowded and they all appear to have been running all winter long. You, alas, have not, but you have good music and you're in the park! Then you start running and things feel creaky. And then the memories of running begin to trickle back, the pain, the misery. But by now you're rounding the bottom of the park, but that's when the horse sh*t smell starts, and it's not even that warm out. You start to think you're not actually going to make it home again.

And that's when the hills start, and your chest feels like it's the size of a pea, afterall it's not THAT warm out. And you realize that only your right earbud is working. But you press on, running slower than some are walking. Finally you make it up to the reservoir loop, taking a moment to stop running and trudge despairingly up the stairs. It's packed...with tourists...taking pictures, oh and couples that are walking slower than a snail in their "workout" clothes, carrying a water bottle and holding hands. Well, just one of those couples, but STILL! That does not a workout make, you do not need a water bottle if your workout involves holding someone's hand.

Finally you make it around the reservoir and head back out to the main road of the park, so close, so close! And just as you come down the very last hill you see four teenagers/college kids walking in a line shoulder to shoulder across the entire walking/running lane and the bike lane. You don't make a move, because to avoid them you would have to run in the middle of the street, so you keep running straight...now it's a game of chicken, they're not moving, you're not moving until, WHAM! Just kidding, you don't actually hit them but you have to STOP while they decide to make a 6 inch space between their shoulder so you can get by. But it's over, and you go home and the kitty is excited because you're stretching on the floor and she gets lots of pets. At least someone felt good after the first outdoor run of the season.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is VERY funny to me today especially since I just got home a few minutes ago from my first outdoor run of the season. I had high expectations as well and that was all it was- expectation and let down! I think the real polish poppy seed bread is the root cause of all of the agony!! What do you think?? And the temp in Memphis was 77 so no chill to blame just winter's laziness!

Caren said...

Ooh, it's definitely all the polish poppy bread I ate last weekend. I can definitely feel good about blaming it on that!

Dan said...

I went running once. It didn't take.